What our best friends tell about us....

Each one of us believes that we are close to one or more people who may or may not be blood related. This choice of people we make tells us not just about them but more so about us. "Birds of the same flock", "Peas in a pod" and countless other proverbs indicating that the amalgamation of these people is in reality our personality. We see a part of ourselves in them and then we seal this bond with the sanctity of friendship.

I've been blessed with friends who continue to stick by me despite my misgivings. This is no small gesture. To truly accept someone, love them despite their shortcomings and to be there "always and forever" is a hard promise to keep. I have had quite a handful who would do this for me and luckily these are the same bunch for whom I've tried to uphold my side of this sacred vow.

Life sometimes is extremely trying and it seems extremely difficult to get by anymore. Just some time spent with one of these people seems to help me go on; to cherish what I've had with them and to endure what I've had to go through without them. Life is unfair and there are people and certain moments which tend to push you. It is these handful that keep you from going over the edge.

I've had quite a few of these people for me and when I see this, I know that my life has been worthwhile. I may not have much of  legacy in terms of materialistic things but I know I've gotten that one thing that most don't have. I have friends with who I am not afraid to be myself. This is a gift and I will live to treasure it till my last breath.

when i truly learnt to love

i have loved you for years now.... but i really didn't know what love truly is, until recently.
We moved from being complete strangers to best friends. And then, i began to love you... each day was a lesson in love.... first i learnt to give love and expect it in return..... then i learnt to give love and not expect you to love me back, but i expected you to take my love and somewhere i never expected you to love someone else.... then i learnt to just give you love without expecting you to take it or be grateful for it... then i learnt to watch you love somebody else and and expected you to understand that it hurts me so much..... then i simply learnt to watch you love someone else and weep silently....then i learnt to be happy that you found love.....
every single time i made attempts to resurrect my broken love life....
but when you asked me to step out of your life because you didnt want me anymore, i found myself giving you what you wanted in a single go without any struggle. i gave you the thing which you wanted and i never thought about what this would do to me....
this was when i truly learnt to love you....

Hollow Spaces

we always seek replacement in life, the good for better and the better for best. at regular intervals we replace small or big things in our lives till some of them settle down to become our routine.... more so we are habituated to those things.. however when we allow ourselves to become habituated to another human, we seldom realize that we become slaves to our own attachment...and when this human detaches from you, it creates a void, a hollow so large that no matter what u do, it will never fill...certain people can never be replaced and the wounds those broken relations cause can never heal....

Living in the present

Seize the moment! Live like there’s no tomorrow! Make the most of now! Now’s the moment! All these things, we are well aware of. Some of us live in the future, most of us are busy re-living the past. How many of us actually manage to live in the present? We spend too much time planning our future, and the remaining time in pondering how we should have reacted in the past. We never spend a day’s minute thinking about what we can do now, to make this moment worth living.

                I was amongst those who spent time worrying about the future and bickering over the past. My past was full of pleasant memories, so the flashback moments always brought a smile to my face. But then I began to worry that my future wouldn’t have these joyous moments. I realized over a matter of time, that I was losing too much precious time in just predicting what may happen. Sadly, there was no way to guarantee my predictions. Needless to say, most of my predictions fell flat and I happened to encounter the unpredictable almost every time.

                This time, I decided to use a new technique. I decided to enjoy my past and not to worry about my future. This did make me happy, no doubt. But I was left with ample free time. So I decided to “seize the moment” as it’s said. I found it a good practice. I learnt to find joy in everything. All my thoughts were just spent in making my present beautiful. Now, I’m not saying that one shouldn’t worry about the consequences of his actions and just enjoy the moment and land up being nowhere in the end. I’m just saying that one should not put unnecessary thought process into action and ruin the present. This whole living in the present formula, worked wonders. I wish I had followed it earlier. I couldn’t help thinking how much of time I could have saved if I had quit knitting dreams of the future and just focused on this moment.

                This method worked well for quite some time. But it had its own flaws. When my present was suffering, I was suffering without breaks. There was nothing to set me free. No matter where I went, I always returned to my present circumstances. It can be quite maddening at times. The whole act of being in the present and making the most of it suddenly seemed like a stupid thing to do. There was no escape for me.

That is when I realized visiting our past, predicting our future were just escape doors for me. They were the secret passages in the fort of my life, where I could escape when my present threatened me. It was then that I finally understood, all of us need to go to our happy moments. We need to feel them to sustain. When our present doesn’t give us joy, we tend to look a little backwards in life. And if we don’t find it there, we move a little ahead of time to search for it in our future.

What happened when the scholar turned an UNDERDOG!

For everyone who always thought how easy life was for the guy who topped his class every time, little did they know what happened when the scholar turned an UNDERDOG!

Who once lived like a prince among all the paupers of knowledge ,

Now wanders the streets helplessly and lives off cheap scraps of wisdom.

He remembers the days when he ruled, how everyone sang his praises.

He craves for attention, for just their traces.

Alas! He gets nothing but blank stares.

He had thought he’s master this new art too, but he sees his raft getting tossed in the sea.

He misses his old charm and glory,

He wishes the new buddies knew his story

What a great man he was,

Always excellent, always the one to surpass,

He has his image to keep,

Thus he chooses silently to weep.

Now he realizes how it is to struggle, what it is to slog,

When a scholar became an UNDERDOG!!!

When your mother never broke up with you..... .

Remember the time you were annoyed with your best friend/ boy friend/girl friend when they forgot your birthday or didn't call you sharp at 12 in the night? Or when they didn't come on time? Or when they didn't call you for too many days? Do you remember how it felt on being cheated and your trust being broken into a million pieces by someone you thought was so close to you? Or when you got the feeling of being useb by the person with whom you shared your books, bags, clothes, food. Remember when someone refused to return the money you lent them and constantly gave excuses. Or when you gave someone advice because you cared and all they did was say that you were a mere interference. Do you remember ow hurt and angry you were at that moment? How your ego came into picture and you swore never to do anything for ungrateful people! We broke relations because there wasn't much to gain from them.

Have you ever thought about the time you might have never really wished your mother at 12 in the night! Or that you have mercilessly cancelled any outings with your mother just because your best friend called at the last minute... Have you ever called up your mother from college/work to ask if she ate lunch and inquire as to what she was doing to pass time? How you ever noticed how many times you must have lied to your mom and broken her trust. How many times we must have ignored her concerns and advice simply because we claim she doesn't understand even without listening what she has to say in the first place. Have you ever realised that your mother never let her ego or even self respect come in the way when she loved you??

We are so busy in loving people who will not be us forever, we love them enough to prevent them from going away.... have we ever thought of loving those who gave us life? who had sleepless nights just because we couldn't sleep, who worked hard, never went to malls an cinemas so they could save up every penny in giving us a comfortable and easy life!Many of us feel our parents embarass us in front of our friends. Have we ever wondered how many times we might have shit in our pants, wet our beds, puked and cried in public? Our parents never left us. They never broke up with us. No matter what we do we can never replay them....it's time that we are atleast grateful . love you MOM!!!!

The measure of closeness!!!

I smiled when i saw you smiling, it always felt nice. It made me realize that we are so close to each other, that we share so much in the little time we've been together. It's quite surprising that i find myself happy when i see that you are smiling, may be because i love your smile. But it is a pleasant feeling to know that when i gain no real happiness from it, still just your happiness gives me immense pleasure. This is wonderful, but that's not all. There have been moments when i have been moved to tears just because you were upset. That is when i realized, the true measure of a relation is by the tears you shed, not from your eyes, but from your heart; the tears shed when i didn't have anything to lose but the mere thought of a lovely smile being wiped from your face , erases my smile too. While many claim to be close and even share sorrow, i have felt the exact you feel. That is the measure of CLOSENESS......